Too scared to lose?


23rd January 2013, she took part in inter-college debate, and messed it up.

2 months later, she took part in National parliamentary debate, and lost.

Today, she is scared. Scared of failure, again.

You must be thinking that she is a loser or rather a zero talent at debates. Well, the truth is she is a national Symposium Gold medalist, has been her school’s best in debates since 3rd standard and an avid compeer.

So what went wrong?

She let a nutshell build over her. Let the fear of losing dominate so profoundly that it took only couple of defeats to break her.

This scenario brings me to a basic question, to ask.

Why are we all so scared to lose?  

If you think I am about to give you a lecture on not being afraid of failures then you are wrong. I am not here to stop you from being afraid because it is like telling a person not to step aside when he is about to be punched or not to flinch at the contact of a hot flame. That is not being human. Rather I am here to tell you to be afraid, but do it anyway. Live anyway!

When we are born, we become automatic participants to the competition with everyone and anyone in this world. Right from the first sack race in playgroup to the sleepless nights in high school during term exams to top the batch. The cricket matches, debates, singing competitions are yet another set of self chosen challenges we throw ourselves into. Then we compete against everyone to find a decent paying job then struggle more to keep up and the ball once set rolling after the first sack race keeps rolling faster than ever before.

Struggle and competition in life are as natural as the sun going down and stars coming out. And to feel scared is as accepted too.  But what is not normal is to let a few defeats convince you sufficiently to give up. What is not normal is to let yourself be told by someone that you are not strong enough. Because only you know that it takes a soft blow to crash the house of cards but committed efforts to build one. Don’t let the voice inside your head tell you that it is not working. There is always going to be another mountain, you will always want to make it move. There will always be another battle, but sometimes you have to lose. Just keep pushing on.

Let us pledge to stand as strong as an enraged lion in front of the failures and as modest as a humble cow in front of our victories. Because it is also important to understand that pride shatters more dreams than failures.

After all,  even the house of cards took numerous breakdowns to  build. And now that it is standing tall, it looks like a palace of gold and platinum  victory.

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About author : Ishita Goel is a 2nd year Dual Degree (B.Tech + MBA) student at Mukesh Patel School of Technology and Management.

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